The Power of Humility
Bamboo is one of the symbols of humility, because it bends with the wind but stays whole.
According to the Oxford dictionary, humility means the quality of being humble: the virtue of being aware of one's own limitations; modesty; simplicity.
It can also mean a feeling of weakness or inferiority, reverence or respect toward superiors, a lack of luxury, or economic disadvantage.
I will discuss humility as a virtue, as a condition that may seem invisible or inferior but turns out to be powerful.
Before going deeper, it is worth noting that everything exists in kind and in degree. That means humility is a kind with infinite degrees: all of us are humble to some degree, whether negatively, neutrally, or positively, and these degrees change with our stage of life.
Imagine a circular thermometer with infinite gradations, with zero as neutral, positive degrees on one side and negative degrees on the other, and the two extremes meeting at the end. Within us, humility sits at some point on this scale, which shows that we are not static, but dynamic.
Humility can come as a feeling that we are something very, very small compared to everything that exists. This feeling carries the understanding that no matter how good we are at something, we are nothing compared to infinity.
It may sound like a sad or harsh picture, but this self-knowledge can be very revealing, because it is exactly what allows a person to recognize their limitations and keep pursuing growth. In this picture it is also possible to understand that we can be great, masters of a certain activity, while knowing we can still get better.
Humility also matters when we face situations where we feel attacked or belittled. In these cases, depending on our level of emotional intelligence, we can act rationally or be hijacked by our emotions.
A common everyday example is someone being poorly served at a store. You may feel something like: "How dare this person treat me this way? I am the customer, and I have every right! I should curse this person out." In moments like this, people often get very upset and feel attacked. If the person is cruel to the clerk, that is an example of a lack of humility.
It may seem strange, but that does not mean we cannot be upset by bad service. It means that inwardly we put ourselves in a position above another person, and that makes it unacceptable to accept treatment different from what we think we deserve, like a king who is not revered by his subjects.
Let's think about the same scenario applying the value of humility to a higher degree. When treated badly, the customer may think: "Hmm... what terrible service! I will politely tell this person that this behavior is inappropriate, so that at least the next customers get better treatment."
Notice the difference when facing the same situation. In the first case, the customer felt offended and let their peace be shaken. In the second, the customer understood that there was a rude person, did not take it personally, and thought about sparing other customers an uncomfortable situation.
All of these mental processes require self-knowledge, and the understanding that the world does not revolve around us and that we are not the measure of all things.
Many thoughts could surround people in a situation like this, but when a person recognizes their limitations, they do not feel offended when someone places them in a position of inferiority, because they know who they are.
A very interesting experiment can be done with a banknote. We can crumple it, fold it, step on it, and then smooth it out. The result is that the bill keeps the same value. Someone mistreating it does not change its worth. It is still a bill.
Many people do not know themselves or their limitations, and they are constantly trying to show that their worth is as high as possible, whether by talking about their achievements, material possessions, or intellectual gifts. This seems very common and, in a way, may be a need for self-affirmation. All of these issues can be worked on and improved, and there are many studies, therapies, and countless other ways to help us.
There is a fable by an unknown author about a farmer who went to ask a monk what humility was. The monk answered:
- Go to the cemetery, curse the dead, and then come back to me.
The farmer went to the cemetery, cursed the dead with all his might, and came back. The monk asked:
- How did it go?
- Nothing happened. I just spoke badly of them and let my anger out.
Then the monk said: - Now go back to the cemetery, praise the dead, and then come back to me.
The farmer was puzzled, but he followed the sage's instruction. At the cemetery he praised the dead, and then he returned to the monk, who asked him again:
- How did it go?
- I gave them my best praise, and nothing happened.
Then the monk explained:
- This is what humility is like: when people insult you, do not feel offended, because the words that come out of other people's mouths do not determine who you are. And when they praise you, do not take it as truth and become vain. Praise does not determine who you are either, because you are who you are.
When we achieve success in a certain situation, people praise us, and we can internalize these comments, believing we are heroes, gods, or stars, when in truth we remain who we are. If you strip away all the clothes, riches, and fame, only the naked human remains. This self-inflation is very common when a person's life changes quickly, because there is no time for their thinking to evolve at the speed of change. In many cases, people's minds break.
It is important to stress that any virtue has to be observed and recognized by others. That means that the moment a person says they are humble, they are automatically considered to lack humility.
Professor Clóvis de Barros Filho offers an interesting reflection on self-praise:
Social circuits of consecration will be more effective the greater the social distance of the consecrated object.
We can see that how we perceive ourselves is not the same as how others perceive us, and in some cases we are aligned with our limitations and in others we are not. An interesting exercise is to ask people who know you and whom you trust what virtues or values they see in you. Then truly listen to others' criticism with an open heart and a reflective mind, to learn from it or to discard what is not healthy.
The power of humility is immense and can transform the world around you. Your perception changes, and so does the way you face circumstances and other people.
I will close with a line from the Spanish writer Miguel de Cervantes.
"Humility is the base and foundation of all virtues, and without it, none of them truly is one."
Comments